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Cheap JAP 101

Brand Wars: GAP Versus Old Navy

Now, I’m using Old Navy for price-point comparison here. This is not to suggest that the brand doesn’t have its fair share of boring and/or nausea inducing clothing. But while Old Navy’s hit or miss, it’s got one thing going for it that GAP better embrace, and fast, if it continues to produce the crap currently on its racks: Old Navy’s always cheap. And - more often than not - it still manages to be cuter than its overpriced comrade.

Button-Front Sweater Vest, GAP, $58. Women’s Striped Boyfriend Cardigan, Old Navy, $26.50. Added Bonus: Striped option does not make wearer look ten lbs heavier. Next.
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Cheap JAP 101

Back from vacay today, chickadees. Many thanks for your patience during my absence - I’m sure you’ve all been pining for my return Look for updates later today. MWAH!

Cheap JAP 101

Fashion Myths: Denim Trends

Sooo it’s almost August, which means it’s time to freak out about Fall Denim. What ever will you do with the the Boyfriend, the Wide Leg, the Bold Color and the Super Skinny styles of yesteryear?! Are they all, like, sooo last season? Fear not, my little chickies. Jeans are a worthy splurge for a reason: Even the trendier styles stay In, season after season. Unfortunately, brand-whoring fashion mags like to use different names for the same thing to dupe you into buying more jeans (as IF your JAPtastic ass doesn’t already own ten uber-In pairs). Here’s a guide to the adjective-heavy denim “trends” designed to make you second guess what’s in your closet. [Thanks in advance to Lucky and ELLE for regurgitating each other’s style tips].

Lucky How To Wear Your Denim Guide, 2008 - Sleek Silhouette
ELLE Denim Trends Fall 2007 - The Skinny Jean
Lucky’s also a fan of Super-Skinny Jeans - apparently, slapping on a superlative distinguishes the trend from ELLE’s Skinny Jean of 2007. The Lucky eds suggest pairing a fitted, sleeveless top with skinny jeans to achieve the Sleek Silhouette look; those of us with boobs know the potential slut-factor of going tight all over. To each her own.
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Cheap JAP 101

How To Wear Confidence, 24/7

I’m no trend whore, but I certainly like to experiment. Alas, playing with trends - like any other risk - can be a bit scary. Because fashion risks inevitably result in the occasional flop. Wearing slightly absurd outfits means strapping on a pair on two capacities: 1. The balls to not give a shit about public opinion re: the outfit in question and 2. The balls to feel awesome wearing it. The first part’s easy, because most people don’t know how to dress. The second part - using your confidence to accessorize an outfit that could go either way - is the challenge.

I found this flower-embellished denim jumper at Beacon’s Williamsburg for around $35 buckaroos. If you think it’s borderline ridiculous now, you should have seen it in its original form, i.e. with pants. Even after I chopped it into shorts, I remained skeptical. I put on a belt and gold hoops; I took off the belt and gold hoops. Something was missing, but I wasn’t sure what. So I did what I always do when I’m feeling a little self-conscious about donning new duds. I put on my “Just Sing It” playlist, and belted out some Alanis. Four songs later, I felt like a rockstar, and was ready to take my outfit out on the town.
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Cheap JAP 101

The Elusive JAPgasm

When I used to put outfits together, I had the luxury of concerning myself only with aesthetics. Why? Because any brand I owned was a JAPtastic one. When I put outfits together now, I have to concern myself with balance. Why? Because even I won’t walk out the door in head-to-toe Forever 21. I might be cheap, but I’m still a JAP, goddammit.

The peak of Cheap JAP outfit perfection - the JAPgasm, if you will - occurs when the outfit in question achieves practicality, class and originality in perfect harmony. Clothes from budget chains a la H&M/Forever 21 make an outfit practical; coveted labels purchased as splurgy poos or at discount a la Loehmann’s/Century 21 give it class; thrift store finds and/or items from Mommy’s closet make it uniquely yours.

The shorts pictured are Forever 21 and cost $19.80: Practicality accomplished. The polka-dot blouse is a Beacon’s Closet find, snagged for $11.95. Originality? Done and done. The shoes are Manolo slingbacks, purchased with Daddy’s Amex back in college. While it makes me nauseous to think about paying full, retail price for them today, I can’t say I regret doing so back then (probs because it wasn’t my money I was spending…whatevs). Even so - four years later - they still make me look and feel a lot more loaded than I am. These three items combined result in a totally JAPgasmic outfit. Ohhh yeah, baby. Yeah. (!!)

Cheap JAP 101

Facebook Fans: So Hot Right Now

We heart trends here at Cheap JAP (most of them), so if you’re not on Facebook yet, you’re like, totally Out. Get on that. Why? So you can FAN CHEAP JAP’s FACEBOOK PAGE, which is something I know you’re all dying to do. Don’t get all huffy. This is more than shameless self-promotion, scout’s honor. This is a place where you’ll post pics of your latest Cheap JAPtastic finds and budget chic outfits, weigh in on what you lurrve and loathe about Cheap JAP, ask advice on your latest wardrobe conundrum, and trade shopping tips with your fellow fab fashionistas. You might even meet some girls who aren’t total beotches, who knows.

This isn’t about me, amazingly enough, and I’ll prove it to you by posting the best of your outfits, videos, comments, tips and questions on the blog each week. Cheap JAP’s giving you the power, so don’t eff it up. Be a fan, and go play.

Cheap JAP 101

It’s WebSnob Time

Dress Yourself
55 Secret Street has a few Simple, Sexy Tops that You Can Wear With Jeans.
Stiletto Jungle shows off 5 fashionista-worthy plus size dresses for summer.
Coquette loves the summer look tiered ruffles.
KRiSTOPHER is wanting, wearing, and hating things for summer tripping.
Stylenotes brings you the list of classic skirt silhouettes and our picks for the best of each style.
The Fashionable Housewife is crazy about African Prints. Hard to find at affordable prices, but well worth the search! Continue reading →

Cheap JAP 101

Leotards and Boobs: How to Deal

In general, high-waisted bottoms should always be paired with a tucked-in top. It’s not a total faux pas to wear them with an untucked shirt, but then you can’t see the high waist, so really, what’s the point of rocking the style at all?

The sartorial snag occurs when you tuck your shirt into your awesome F21 shorts and notice that the shirt has bunched beneath the surface, resulting in wrinkles nearly as offensive as panty lines. Possibly my pants are just too tight…whatevs, you only live once.

I recently expressed my irritation over this serious matter to an American Apparel salesgirl. She, of course, suggested the very same leotard she was wearing at the time - an easy solution for her cute little A-cups. But for those of us with serious boobage, not so much. Or so I thought…until I re-discovered an item I haven’t worn since my JV soccer days: The sports bra.

The sports bra is THE solution to this two-part fashion conundrum; it enables the well-endowed to don leotards without flopping all over the place or showcasing their lingerie, which in turn completes the leotard + high-waisted bottoms = zero shirt wrinkles equation.

Is the overall look a little bit Flashdance? Was Jennifer Beals the most adorably sexy thang ever to don legwarmers? Yes and yes. I love the 80s, and you should too.

Cheap JAP 101

WebSnob Weekly Roundup

Beauty Booty
55 Secret Street offers a few tips on How To Not Look Old (Hint: Start Young!)
All About the Pretty has a little glimmer and shimmer for her hair with Redken’s Glimmer Shimmer Treatment.
Beauty Snob travels in style with Ooh La Spa!
SugarShock Beauty is loving the humble bar soap again, courtesy of Mor’s gorgeously crafted Moroccan Mint Soap.
The Coveted wonders if she really needs another vibrator in her purse.
Beat the heat with WE LOVE BEAUTY’s favorite products for poolside beauty! Continue reading →

Cheap JAP 101

The Top Five Ways to Score at a Sample Sale

It goes without saying that sample sales are scary as fuck. Why? Because the likelihood of taking an “accidental” elbow to the eye from a fellow female shopper increases in direct proportion to the awesomeness of the brand in question. Alas, there are too many JAPtastic labels at 30-70% off this week to ignore the blessing/curse that is the sample sale - among them Botkier (no, NOT “for Target”), L.A.M.B., Alice and Olivia, Generra and Rag & Bone. I must heed my inner label whore and check them out…but not before a refresher course in the Top Five Ways to Score at a Sample Sale.

1. No Time Frames Allowed
I’m sympathetic to the fact that most people are nine-to-fivers, so I’m not going to suggest you take a personal day to get there the second the sale opens (oh, wait…). But you’re not going to find anything decent over the course of a lunch break. If you don’t allow yourself at least an hour of browsing time, you’ll either buy something unnecessary and/or fugly, or leave embittered by your inability to score.

2. Eyes On the Prize
If I’m looking for a big effing awesome tote at a sample sale, I’m not going to putz around with clutches or wallets. Know what you want before you go, and only deviate from it after you’ve assessed and rejected the full selection offered. Should you happen to find what you’re looking for, don’t start browsing on your shopper’s high - you’re too giddy to think rationally, and you’ll end up spending a buttload more than you intended. Continue reading →

Cheap JAP 101

Basic Tees, Infinite Possibilities

I’ve probably gone through sixty or so assorted James Perse, Splendid, Three Dot and Michael Stars shirts throughout the course of my JAPpy existence. Only when I found myself without Daddy’s plastic did I realize the absurdity of the $50 t-shirt. Still, I wasn’t initially sure that the fabulous fit and quality reminiscent of my once-fave brands for basics could be found elsewhere. Enter American Apparel.

Over the past month, I’ve accumulated five bonafide basic shirts from the store - the Baby Rib Basic Short Sleeve Tee in white and the Tri-Blend Short Sleeve Deep V-Neck in grey in addition to the three shirts pictured. The colorful tanks are a refreshing departure from my usual, plain ol’ wifebeaters, and look fab layered under button-down shirts or jumpers. The tees can be tucked into high-waisted shorts and paired with wedges as easily as they can be thrown on with jeans.

Ideally, basics worn continually in different combinations keep your peers from realizing that they’ve seen the same shirt on you three times in a row. What I love about American Apparel’s isn’t just the price (all are less than half of what a JAP typically ponies up for a “perfect white tee”); it’s the quality. It’s not like, “Oh, for eighteen bucks, that’s a great-fitting tee.” It’s like, “How is your tee as cute as mine when I paid $54 for Splendid and you paid $24 for effing American Apparel? So not fair!”

Cheap JAP 101

The Myth of the “Under $100 Outfit”

Sooo, Lucky Mag is running a “Summer Under $100″ story that features - you guessed it - warm-weather items under $100. Kudos to them, for serious. Some of the options, like the $50 Wanted Patent Penthouse Heel pictured, are actually as adorable as they are affordable (def just reached my alliteration quota for the day…whatevs). My problem isn’t with the compilation of under-$100 items; approximately 87% of everything I buy meets that criteria. My problem is with the bullshit Lucky was spouting this morning on The Today Show; that a trendy, fab outfit can be had for less than $100. For any girl even remotely concerned with looking loaded (so, like, all of us) the $100 outfit is an effing joke. Why? Two words: Shoes and Handbags.
A Benjamin is more than enough to get you dressed from torso to ankle, no question. But if I’m wearing $7.99 sandals from Forever 21 and a $14.99 bag from Target along with my cheap ensemble, I am not feeling loaded. I am feeling like I’m wearing Forever 21 sandals and a Target bag. (Addendum: Forever 21 is about short-term trend experimentation, not long-term wear - their faux leather shoes tend to have the lifespan of a gnat.).
I’m not suggesting that one needs a different pair of pricey shoes and a different designer bag for every outfit. I am suggesting that spending $100 on a pair of kickass wedges you’ll wear all summer is a better investment than blowing $100 on a head-to-toe outfit that looks as cheap as it is. Where handbags are concerned, well, you know where I stand. Save your dough for one you’ll wear every day, and raid Mommy’s Closet for evening bags. And if you’re in dire need of a quick bag fix, hit a thrift store. You’ll find something that’s a hell of a lot more original (and a lot less likely to out you as cheap) than anything Isaac Mizrahi for Target.

Cheap JAP 101

Big Brown Bag, Big Brown Bust

Growing up, Bloomingdales was to me what Saks is to my mother: Mecca. I’d gaze at the throngs of brand-name clad twentysomethings and think, “Someday, when I live in the city, I’ll shop here, and be just as stylish and loaded and vain as those girls.” I couldn’t effing wait.

In my epilogue, I’ve got the style and the vanity thing covered. I’ve even managed to look as loaded as the JAPtastic fashionistas who once inspired me. But I stopped seeing Bloomies through Rose-Colored Oliver Peoples long ago. The Memorial Day Weekend sale reminded me why.

One has two choices when braving the hordes of wannabe-bargain shoppers at Bloomies’s Memorial Day Weekend Sale; pricey, fab designer wares or cheap, fugly second-tier brands. Even at 30% off of its already-reduced price, a Nanette Lepore blazer is still upwards of $150. Even at 30% off its already-reduced price, a $40 Hard Tail tracksuit is still a Hard Tail tracksuit. If I’d had a minimum of three hours to spend, I might have found something akin to an $80 Marc Jacobs top. I might also have gone insane in the process. Continue reading →

Cheap JAP 101

WebSnob Weekly Round Up

It’s that time again!

Calculatus Eliminatus lays out the knowledge how to button your goddamn polo shirt once and for all!
Fashion, Evolved talks to the creative force behind MINK Shoes.
Take Louis Vuitton along as a tour guide on your next trip, suggests Fashiontribes.
I’m Not Obsessed shows you how to steal two of Gwyneth Paltrow’s red carpet looks from Cannes.
KRiSTOPHER finds the best - and worst - of Net-a-Porter’s sale. Continue reading →

Cheap JAP 101

Sephora No More-A

I used to consider makeup something that couldn’t be scrimped on. I mean, it’s your face, you wear it every day. What’s an occasional $42 for Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer or $29 for Nars Bronzing Powder? $71 might seem a little steep for two items, but it’s worth spending on stuff you use every day, right?
Wrong. So effing wrong. With brand-name clothes, sometimes you get what you pay for; an F21 dress will probs fall apart before a DVF, and that’s life. But with brand-name makeup, I’ve found the opposite to be true: Cost doth not beget quality.
If you haven’t jumped on the mineral/organic makeup bandwagon yet, it’s time. Not because it’s made with natural anti-oxidants and leaves out most of the 100-plus chemicals used in other makeup. Not because you’ll notice a visible difference in your punim. But because it’s so. freaking. cheap. Continue reading →